Dates matter

Some dates are important.

They need to be remembered on the day they happened.

Birthdays.

Weddings.

Graduations.

For me, I love to remember the happy things in life. 

For the not so happy things, whilst I think it is important to remember them, I don’t want specific dates to be associated with them. For example, I don’t want Christmas to be spoiled because something sad happened in my world just before or after it.

Or so I thought. 

Turns out I seem to find the dates of the sad things important too. 

I had to stay late at work today. It was busy, things had to be done. I had planned to visit the cemetery. I’ve been there on an off for the past year and half or so. I don’t really enjoy it – I don’t think one is supposed to have a good time there, but I am always glad I’ve been. 

Today, having planned to go, and then finding that it might not be possible, I discovered that I really did care about going on a significant date. 

As it is June, it was actually still light enough after I left work, so I decided to pay a quick visit. (gates were open, but once I had parked it seems that the cemetery is actually closed to ‘visitors’. It had been such an emotional rollercoaster of a day that I decided to ignore the signs and stood for a few moments at the foot of the final earthly resting place of both my mum and dad. 

As I stood, I reflected on the world that we live in. The unprecedented impact of Covid-19, the protests in the USA, London and beyond. I wondered what mum and dad would have made of it all. On one hand I am glad that they are free from all the change and risk that Covid-19 has brought, on the other, I wish I was able to talk to them about it, to learn from their experience.

I wondered how they would have coped with things like church by Zoom, and not being able to give their grandchildren a hug. 

The strange thing about faith, at least the faith that I have, and that I know my parents shared, is that whilst I would give almost anything to have them here with me right now, I know with absolute assurance that they are in a much, much better place. I know that I will see them again. I know that if I could but glimpse the experience they were currently having, I would want to be there more than I want them back here.

The Apostle Paul summed that up well when he wrote “For me, to live is Christ, to die is gain.” He understood that co-labouring with Christ here on earth was often a painful, but always worth it experience. He also knew that finding himself with Christ on the other side of death was infinitely better. 

I believe that too. It doesn’t always stop the tears though.

It was important that I went today. 

I miss them both.

4 thoughts on “Dates matter

  1. Yes, it’s important to remember…. Especially those loved ones… Those memories…. Blessings to you Brian, especially today… It’s my baby’s 35th birthday and yet 9 months since my dear old Mum passed away…. And the day my darling granddaughter tried to sing “hap birthday to me, hap birth to you” to her daddy, my son, as she is just learning to speak. .. Dates are important, we celebrate the birth of our Saviour… His death, resurrection… His ascension… The coming of Holy Spirit….
    We learn from those who’ve been before… And we invest in those who follow on from us…

    Sending you love and all God’s blessings today and every day, Brian…. X

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  2. Brian, Thanks for sharing your emotional rollercoaster. 2 parents who on certain occasions will definitely prompt vivid memories….so cherished!

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  3. Thanks for sharing your honesty and heart Brian. My dad has been gone almost 9 years and I find now I
    mostly remember him when something specific happens that he would have had a connection to. Like MotoGP, the Eagles, a really loud and fast car…
    you are so blessed to have had the kind of parents you yearn for another day with. xx

    Like

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